I had an absolutely AWESOME time at Wicked Book Weekend, and if you know what's good for you, you'll attend next year. Still not convinced? Well, maybe this stuff will do the trick.
1. People used to the cold tundra of the north will find Florida warm at all times, while Floridians are wearing nothing short of a parka.
2. Certain lighting will make Tara Sivec's face look like she's contracted a flesh eating virus, and at the same time, make me look possessed by the devil.
3. Pam Godwin is really effing hot. Like really, really hot.
4. Joanne Christenson wins everything. And she deserves to. She'll also make a really classy recovery from a fall by yelling, "Bitch down!"
5. Jenn Cooksey has one of the coolest tattoos ever on her arm. She'll also let you admire it for awkward lengths of time.
6. Ivie is one of the sweetest, most awesome organizers you could possibly ask for. And her husband is a G.
7. If at any time you disappear to call your husband, people's first assumption will be that you've been kidnapped.
8. Attending husbands will gravitate toward other husbands like heat seeking missiles.
9. Desiree Gorman can freaking move. Like whoa.
10. If you ask really nicely, certain tattoo artists will "talk dirty to you".
11. The life of a bellhop at events like this is one thread short of suicide watch. Boxes, boxes, and more boxes.
12. If your roommate jokingly answers with "no" when you ask if she's decent, the bellhop will come to a screeching halt just outside of your room. The look of panic will never leave his face the whole time he's in your room.
13. Buffy walks really, really fast.
14. One reader in particular doesn't find her brother cute enough to consider partaking in incest.
15. If you ask a reader their favorite sexual position at this event, they'll answer with no hesitation.
16. You will see more boobs than you would at a bachelor party in a strip club.
17. Tessa Teevan has the best blank stare ever. She will stare you down after you say something to her until you're considering crawling away in shame, and then resurrect your self esteem at the last second with a really big smile.
18. Harper Sloan's personality is almost as nice as her ass.
19. Being seated directly next to the vibrator races is like hitting the lottery.
20. In NO way will you ever manage to spend enough time with all of the awesome people that you really want to.
***Addition***21. As a signing author, unless you make someone your bitch and send them around the room with your stuff you want signed, you won't get any autographs. :(
There is SO much more I could include on this list, so I'll add to it as more and more memories come back to me. :)